From the animals

It’s one thing to subject ourselves to EMFs, sugar, carbohydrates, garbage, polluted air, and bad water. But what about the animals? Yea, it’s cool to go to the Flamingo to hang out with them and drink beer. What a paradise to have the wild right there and a place to gamble just ten yards away. How cool, right? Not! Super fail. I sat down with the big stars of the strip to get the low-down of living in Vegas.

Fred Flamingo was the first I interviewed. It was hard to get him to answer organically and spoke mostly off-record. Probably wanted to protect his job. It is my opinion that his bracelet was given to him and was enough bling to entice him into this life on the strip. I am also guessing he is OK with the hazards of his job. He makes big cash and has a plush pad in the Trump Towers. So mark up one for “does not care”.

Not really a carp Suzanne tried to convince me that she was. I got nothing about her background and genome. Something to hide? Perhaps. After a short time I realized she must be suffering from some kind of bi-polar condition and living in a abstract world. Probably from all the carbs she had in her diet. When asked about her favorite part of living on the strip she replied that all the free popcorn was the coolest. That’s a vote for “all for it”.

Prince Downey is a beautiful white bird that has a distinctive red comb. We shared a glass of wine and talked about arts and movies. Clearly the snob of the strip this bird prefers to run with the rich and famous. As of this writing “Dowers” as his friends call him was set to sing backup for Elton John. Mark Dowers down for “I’m to fancy for my hood”.

Buck is the ugly duckling of the strip. He seems to have identity issues and is always trying to impress others. From winning the annual Vegas Duck Run Ultra to setting records for holding his breath Buck was a hard interview. He only agreed to be interviewed during one of his workouts. Mark him down for “I’m moving to Durango”.

Steve “The Statue” is a strip performer. Today he is performing his live rendition of what he calls “Inner Soul”. Off camera we sat down where he revealed his inner most desire to be a mountain climber. He has plans to save money and move to the high country. I left a twenty in his bucket.

And thats it folks right from the inner city animals. Even though they are destine for the same fate as us humans they seem to adapt just fine. For me, this animal is getting out town.

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